She doesn't need mama

Two things happened today.

Keina woke up from her nap. Popo & I both went into the room to get her. She chose Popo over me to pick her up. I felt rejected.

Keina and I stepped out of the house to go downstairs to pick up Gonggong. We met the Uncle and his grandson who is 2.5yr old at the corridor. She went to Uncle to ask for 'baobao'. He carried her put her down and she continued staying at his feet asking him to pick her up again despite my attempts to cajole her to follow me. I pick her up and get her to say 'byebye' and walk away. She starts whining and resisting. I felt so embarrassed and once again rejected.

Both happened within a span of 1h.

I'm so going to let her cry it out to sleep and just go for a night out with my girlfriends. That ungrateful brat! Aaargh. I totally know it's just her temperaments and she is really excited by the 180 changes and strangers. She is really quite extroverted I suppose. I shouldn't take it personally but there I am nursing her through all the teething, allowing her to take comfort as I bear through the sore boobs and there she is flirting with the big bad fresh world of people outside.

Well, there, the flip side of maternal feelings. Raw and very real.